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Some of the foreigners are being massaged by the young men, while others are chatting and laughing intimately with them. Ton, a year-old Thai man with an engaging smile, has owned this bar for a year.

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What used to be an unassuming gay bar in Bangkok's Silom Soi 4 gay scene is now one of the hottest gay hangouts in the city. Every evening from around 9pm Stranger Bar has a hilarious drag show featuring some of the most talented, quirky and hottest queens from all around Asia.

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I eventually got to know this routine. I am used to relationships that move along quickly and I share what I have with my partner and likewise. It took me a while to figure this one out, but this was a precaution so he wouldn't be seen going upstairs with girls. I borrowed a pair of binoculars from my father and crept around to the boulders on the end of the beach thai bar boys night.

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But I was enamored. So many new farangs showed up unceasingly that I grew bored with having the same conversation every day. Sometimes you have to take a step back to see how ridiculous you look to others and I was nowhere near that point of self-reflection.

They didn't want to hold hands in public. Power, you know? Upon my return, half an hour later, he was again kissing the same thai bar boys I was in the mood for an adventure. To my face. At that point I didn't know that motorbike repairs don't cost 20, THB — but I found out what does cost that much when we broke up. We returned to the island and I d partying.

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I went to the funeral are you kidding me? I thai bar boys also show up at the bar at odd hours of the night, and creep around the outside of the crowd for a few minutes to see if he was chatting up other girls. It's no wonder there are so many fights.

However, by the time of the November party, my attitude had come around to include the smiling brown men I saw every day. On full moon party night, Top was working at a beach bar in front of Paradise Bungalows. Did you know that the beach bar boys make only about baht per night? With one party behind me and another approaching I was beach royalty.

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I know! Top took the 20, baht I gave him and bought a gun. Another example of what I thought were special circumstances happened two days later as we were riding on his motorcycle my favorite activity as it gave me a thai bar boys to show off. A day or so later I dropped off some things he had left in my bungalow like his bong. Meanwhile, I was bored with the party, bored with the partiers. So…I invited him back to my bungalow, and over a few days I thought we developed a 'relationship' but it really only entailed thai bar boys giving him money first just for food, later it became more and him lying to me.

It scared me. My demeanor was such that I was now the old pro who lorded it over the newbie travellers because I had a little more information than they. Top had multiple tattoos, a chin piercing, a shaggy purple mohawk, a motorcycle, the works. Later, I even asked around but only one person told me anything about him — that Paow had a baby. Well, after Christmas we stocked up on food and booze and we went to visit his family for New Year.

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One bar boy told me that sometimes a farang guy would ask for booze by name and then sip it appreciatively and all the while thai bar boys bar guy knew that it was the same stupid rotgut whisky. He never was. Thailand is not a routine destination for Americans and I encountered few countrymen while I was there. First, a little background. Having a Thai boyfriend during the parties sucks as they are super-jealous and you cannot so much as dance with another man, while your bar boy is working all night long and you are left by yourself.

It worked both ways. Thais come from all over the countryside to work in the holiday hot spots of Thailand.

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If we were going back to my bungalow, he would start walking and I was supposed to catch up to him. I was stupid. He said he had to stay away from the resort towns and beaches. I do know that the mafia on Haad Rin run the drugs, the guns, everything. Paow later admitted to being the father of the child, but professed his undying love for ME of course! Being honest myself I just assume that other people are being honest too.

Smiling serenely, as Thais do. Everyone in the vicinity, including Top and the girl, ran for cover at the Paradise restaurant. I immediately confronted him — probably embarrassing him as raised voices are frowned upon in Thai culture. They shook their he at me and clucked their tongues, but they let me do my thing. They further refused to be seen with me on the beach, eating in restaurants around town or anything other than out at night. We went to dinner thai bar boys it turns out that all of the places that were going to do a Christmas dinner for the farang crowd had done their dinners on Christmas Eve.

I had effectively missed Christmas for this guy. Apparently working in the bar was a bit of a promotion and it enabled Top to posture and preen and drink and give away free drinks to his friends. Thai men bar boys started looking better and better as I was looking at them in a new light. The way it worked was that Paow would charm me each night, then tell me to meet him in the upstairs part of the bar in five minutes. A short time on Phangan translates to a long time state of mind.

I mean, there were extenuating circumstances for a lot of thai bar boys actions. Here are the bar boys, barely out of adolescence, working their asses off night and day for a pittance and here are the farang guys, same age, with money to burn and partying like crazy and the only difference is by virtue of birthplace.

For example, Top took me to his home in Tong Sala and I met his family. Despite how this sounds, I'm not as dumb as a post. Their skinny, sinewy bodies seemed too delicate for my taste. Recently divorced, I was thai bar boys to cut loose and party hardy.

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Having thai bar boys much about the party mostly since my arrival in Bangkok I was anxious to view it for myself. Add in a few drinks on both sides and a dash of raging hormones and the next thing you have is a knife fight or a shooting. More money than brains at the time. Lonely I guess. It was one of the hastily erected drink stands that go up each month and come down the very next day.

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Eventually I got tired of the scene and I walked away to cool down. Following the family visit Paow and I went to Nakhon.

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I conveniently forgot this piece of information, thinking that the Thai informant was trying to pull my farang leg. I preferred the taller, fuller men of European descent, with hair on their chests and muscles on their arms. Just then the skies opened and it started to pour rain on the party. But this was Thailand and I had more money than I usually do, having recently sold my house. Bar boys, they creep into your bungalow at night and creep out at dawn to go back to work or go home to their girlfriends. I was traveling and trying to shed my workaday image, and make sense of my life.

On my first night back from Bangkok, Paow gave me a rose. I'm sure he planned thai bar boys escapades that way because he ostensibly stayed with her but he had use of a thai bar boys on the upper floor of the bar where he later told me that he took many, many, many Farang girls to have five-minute sex with them. Whatever, I was stupid.

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He didn't have a gun. I don't know.

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They were a very nice family, but poor, living in the Thai countryside in a house without running water. What made me so desperate as to put up with this crap? While he may not have had a baby, Paow did NOT tell me that he had a 7-months pregnant girlfriend!!!!! I went to Koh Phangan in for the October version of the full moon party. I thought I had come to know him a little bit from visits to the bar.

So I had my first encounter with a Thai guy in early November,between full moon parties. To me, Thailand was exotic and new, fresh and undiscovered. The Thai mafia is real. Three days prior to Christmas, Paow called to say that I was to come thai bar boys Krabi right away and meet him there. How long have you been in Thailand? Initially my attraction thai bar boys Thai men was non-existent.

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So I thought I had found true love. The next week, his mom died. Oh yes, the sex wasn't even that good. I spied on Paow to see if he was flirting with anyone.

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Guns are outlawed in Thailand, which means that only outlaws have them. I was 33 years old and still am an American woman. I thought I checked him out enough. So I knew his family needed money. He was lying to me.